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Chuck Norris can skeletize a cow in two minutes.
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Chuck Norris doesn't kill two birds with one stone. Chuck Norris kills all birds, with two stones.
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Chuck Norris is like a dog, not only because he can smell fear, but because he can piss on whatever he wants.
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No matter what your mother always said, Chuck Norris can tune a fish.
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Chuck Norris eats eight meals a day. Seven are steak, and the last is the rest of the cow.
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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from Chuck Norris. When Chuck Norris saw this, he roundhouse kicked the chiken that ran away from him.
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Chuck Norris can teach an old dog new tricks.
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When Chuck Norris goes swimming with sharks, the sharks wear chain mill.
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Chuck Norris mathematically proved that the bird is the word.
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Chuck Norris once won an underwater breathing contest with a fish.
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All the animals in the movie "Avatar" where not CGI, they where on loan from Chuck Norris' petting zoo.
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Beware of dogs... Dogs, beware of Chuck Norris.
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The Loch Ness Monster, and Bigfoot hid themselves far beyond civilization after they saw what Chuck Norris could do to a bear in Walker Texas Ranger
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